Joining the world of online dating: Advice for signing up

After you have deliberated about the advantages and disadvantages of online dating, and decided to try online dating, the first step is to sign up!

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." - Lao-tzu
 So let's start!

Choose a website
There are various websites, some of which are free.  Some think that dating websites where you pay for membership tend to have people who look for more serious relationships.  However, obviously not everyone on free websites want a casual relationship, and sometimes people on paid websites will also go onto free websites.  There are also websites for specific interests such a particular type of relationship (casual, serious, polyamorous), ethnicity, religion, or profession.

Popular websites:
Paid - Match, eHarmony
Free - OkCupid, Plenty of Fish, Coffee Meets Bagel

Sign up
It may take at least an hour (even a few hours) to sign up and create your profile, depending on the number of questions the website has.  Take the time to answer each question accurately.  The time you put into this can help you meet your soulmate (or at least someone who is better matched for you), so isn't that worth it?

You will need an email account to sign up so the website can send you correspondences and notifications.  I recommend having a separate email account for online dating due to the volume of emails you will receive and to separate it from your personal emails.  Do not have personal identifiers linked to your dating email account (such as having your full real name in the username) to keep anonymity in case you give out this email to potential dates.

Questions about you
There will be demographic questions such as your sexual orientation, age, height, body type, eye/hair color, where you live, relationship/children status, ethnicity, language(s) spoken, religion, education, profession, income, political views, and even astrological sign.  You may be asked about your interests/passions/skills, personality traits, values, favorite things, smoking/drinking/drug habits, exercise habits, pets, and last book(s) read.  There may also be icebreaker questions.  Depending on the website, most but not all of your answers are displayed on your profile for others to see.

Answer all questions honestly.  Some people are dishonest about their age, height (rounding up to the nearest inch is fine though), body type, or income in an attempt to get a date more easily.  However, your date will eventually find out and have a bad impression of you.  It's better to just be truthful.

Your profile
You will be asked to create a username.  Do not use your full name (for anonymity purposes) or something inappropriate (such as "big_pimping").

It is crucial to have a good profile description and pictures.  You cannot make your first impression in person.  Your profile is the only thing others will see, and you want to make yourself stand out from the thousands of competitors you have.  You can be Brad Pitt but if you sound dumb or lazy from your profile because you have multiple spelling/grammatical mistakes or a very brief profile description, you won't get as many dates.  Conversely, if you are not the most attractive but have a terrific profile, people may give you a chance.  For help with your profile, see my posts on Advice for online dating profiles and What impresses women and men. 

Examples of actual (bad) profiles I have seen:

"i;m only writng because it won't let me advance without doing this, i really don't have anything to say at this point"

"My do lists are nothing special - almost like everybody else, I don’t like describing myself to much and I don't photograph well (as you can see)"

"My favorite outfit is a spandex and tight pink tank top. when its raining I like to stay in and watch porn."

"Am a simple guy who take life with easy, which to make friends with straight forward people and i luv to meet to luv and be luv. i need love and not players. i am here to find true and real love, i do not want who can not trust. Been with me will be fun, i luv travelling and i smile alot."

 
Questions about your prospective partner

Prince Charming

There may be a battery of questions which will be used to help match you with a prospective partner.  Questions may inquire about preferences for your ideal partner's demographics, appearance, interests, personality traits, values, relationship/children status, profession/income bracket, and smoking/drinking/drug habits.  (See my post on Who to date or not date.)

- Age:  I personally use the person's preferred age parameters as a marker of maturity and the type of relationship they want.  A man in his 60s looking for a 18-25 year old woman likely wants a physical and/or casual relationship.  (I understand this may not always be the case, but it probably is.)  However, I think that a 35 year old man who is looking for a 25-40 year old woman is open-minded, appropriate and mature.  On the flip side, some people don't even regard your age preferences and will contact you even though they are not close to your stated parameters.  Although I specify that I prefer men in their early 30s to early 40s, I often get correspondences from men over 50 (even as old as 93!). 

- Location:  Think about how far you are willing to travel each time to see your partner.

- Height, body type, relationship/children status, ethnicity, religion, income, etc:  Be honest if you have specific preferences.  Otherwise, you will waste someone else's time if they contact you but you are not interested based on a specific parameter.  However, if there is the slightest chance you are willing to date outside your preferred parameters, leave the preference "open" (or have a wide range) so you don't limit prospects.

After you are done signing up and creating your profile, the fun starts!  Welcome to the world of online dating!  For the next step, please see my post on How to get a date.