Progress report - Two months of online dating

It has been two months since I started online dating.  I have not had as many dates with different guys in the second month because I have been busy and because I have been seeing one guy ("Robocop") a few times (whom I met in the first month).  He is the only guy from the dating website whom I have seen again after the first date.  He does not have all the qualities I am looking for in a long-term partner, but he has some very good qualities and I enjoy my time with him, so I will see how things go.

Friends have advised me to have "low expectations" with people I meet online.  One friend has said that online dating is like 'dumpster diving' for a mate.  Another friend calls dating a "rough sport."  I agree with at least the latter statement.  Although each date I have had with the men from online dating went well overall, I did not see most going further past the first date.  I don't think the men were necessarily bad, I just don't think they were for me.  There was no connection or I did not see them as a long-term partner for me.

But I wanted to share some funny or not-so-pleasant events that happened during my first dates so far:

- One guy accidentally stole my metrocard.  Unbeknownst to me, I dropped it onto the floor when I got up to go to the restroom at the restaurant and he picked it up, not knowing it was mine.  When we were walking to the subway station, I realized I was missing my metrocard when I searched my pockets.  He confessed that he found one and that it must have been mine.  He returned it but it was an awkward moment.

- One guy was supposed to take me to a restaurant but needed to get the name of the restaurant from a friend.  However, he never followed through and we ended up having tea.  So I went home hungry.  But he didn't because he had already eaten before we met!  He was also not presentable because his shirt was terribly wrinkled.  And he passed gas in the middle of the date.  The biggest red flag was that he was in his late thirties and still living in a small apt with two roommates, and he admitted he was bad at saving money.

 -  Another guy looked much older for his age (50s) while I look very young for my age (20s), so we looked a generation apart even though we are only 10 years apart.  When the bill came and I offered to pay my share, he didn't even try to pay for me.  He just said, "we'll split the bill" as if he was doing me a favor for not having to pay for him.  And when we left the restaurant that night, instead of walking me to my car, he was going to walk to his car yet he lives a few blocks away!

- I had a real connection with one guy who seemed near perfect.  He seemed to have all the qualities I was looking for, and said all the right things when we texted, emailed, or spoke on the phone.  However, when we were supposed to arrange a time and place to finally meet, he did not call me... and this happened twice.  Although I was disappointed at first, I was not upset for long.  He could not have been that perfect if he did not call after I gave him a second chance.  And he probably was not the person he portrayed himself to be.  He likely said all those nice things to make himself seem like such a great catch.  I learned to be aware of sweet talkers.  It was good to learn that he was a jerk early than after investing time and emotion into the relationship.

From my experiences on these dates, I have comprised suggestions on what to do or not do, and questions to ask, on first dates.  Please refer to my posts on Advice for first dates and Questions to ask on a first date.

I have not given up hope in men... yet.  I know the type of guy I want.  And dating will help me learn or confirm what I like and don't like.  Dating will also show me what I want but didn't know or think I wanted.  It is easy to fall into the mentality that we will never find the perfect one, but I have not given up hope, at least not yet.  And when I do find him, it will be worth the wait because it will be amazing and life will never be the same again.